I think drunk drivers should stop hitting shit, cause they messing it up for all the good drunk drivers that don’t smash into telephone poles. You ever been so drunk and about to drive you surprised that passengers still get in the car with you? Like damn you all must really need a ride. You ain’t got no cab fare no bus money, what are you doing with your life? You must not value your safety at all…whatever, give me some of that burrito.

Hannibal Buress